Run dates: November 14-17 and 21-24
Directed by Dana Skiles
Eccentric Bud Granger, Hollywood screenwriter, decides to give up life in the fast lane and buys a lodge in Tumbleweed, Arizona. The inn is a termite pile, but, as it's located near the fabled "Lost Dutchman Mine," Bud thinks he might soon be a reclusive millionaire. What he didn't figure on is that the lodge is full of nuts…a little old lady who is in touch with "Space People;" outraged tourists who thought the lodge would be like the Ritz; Oysters Rockefeller, an emotional mobster who won't stay dead; aspiring starlet Chi-Chi Vazoom who finds lizards "cute." Then Bud's zany mother unexpectedly arrives! And did we mention the FBI, a corpse on roller skates, the state lottery, the mysterious flight bag, brussels sprouts on a stick?
6 males (20’s – 60’s)
8 females (20’s – 60’s)
MALES (20s-60s)
Dimitri Jones: 20s–50s, (Russian Accent). an inept foreign spy, terrified of being sent back to his home country. Becomes determined to be the “best” spy resulting in cartoon hijinks reminiscent of “Spy vs Spy”.
Sheriff Bates: 40s–60s, (Southern Accent). The friendly local sheriff that isn’t the brightest bulb but holds to his southern manners even as the chaos rains down around him.
Bud Granger: 20s–30s. An unsuccessful screenwriter from Hollywood, Bud now writes B grade horror scripts as his therapy. His new focus is buying the lodge so he has access to the surrounding land which, he is adamant, holds buried treasure.
Arthur Whitney: 30s–50s. Recently married to June, he is here for his honeymoon. When they find out the Ritz-Apache is nothing like the Ritz-Carlton, Arthur takes it in stride, viewing it as an adventure, joining Bud on his treasure hunt.
Oysters Rockerfeller: 30s–50s, (Boston Accent). An intimidating mobster with anger issues and less than average intelligence, the hunt for his missing airplane bag reveals his inner child and lack of willingness to follow through on his threats.
Larry Lime: 30s–60s. A stereotypical sleezy Hollywood producer. He has followed Bud to Arizona to convince him to come back to show biz. He clearly thinks he has more charisma and charm than he actually does and will not take “no” for an answer from Bud.
FEMALES (20s-60s)
Gert Witherspoon: 50s–60s. Previous owner of the Lodge staying through the transition to Bud. She has seen everything and nothing fazes her anymore. She is also not afraid to say what everyone is thinking.
Cora Ames: 50s–70s. A sweet, harmless older lady who is a long-time resident of the Lodge. With an interesting fashion sense, an obsession with crystals and more than a few screws loose, she is convinced that the aliens who abducted her years ago are returning and preparations must be made.
June Whitney: 30s–50s. Recently married to Arthur, she is high-maintenance and very vocal about her disappointment with the lodge. Since she was expecting the Ritz-Carlton, she takes it upon herself to point out everything that falls short and doesn’t appreciate her husband’s enthusiasm for “adventure”.
Susan Claypool: 20s–50s. An undercover FBI agent charged with being Dimitri’s handler, although sometimes she is more like a mother wrangling a toddler. She becomes increasingly paranoid that she is being watched and she will get fired for not keeping Dimitri under control.
Tilly Granger: 50s–60s; Bud’s mother and a failed Hollywood actress. She has come to the Lodge to convince her son that he is, indeed, crazy. She is also convinced it is Hollywood’s fault for not recognizing her talent and making her a star.
Chi-Chi Vazoom: 20s–30s. Girlfriend to Oysters. She is a pure air-head with a naive heart of gold. She, mistakenly, believes that Oysters is her way to make her way to Hollywood and become a Starlet.
Fay Armstrong: 20s–40s. An investigative reporter trying desperately to get the real story on Oysters. When chaos erupts in the Lodge, she is like a kid in a candy store with all the potential gossip and scandals.
Karen Russell: 20s–60s. The very professional lottery official that brings with her unexpected news to all in the Lodge. (Perfect for someone wanting a small role.)
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